RELATIONSHIP ECONOMICS

Last nite I watched Mike & Molly, one of my favorite shows and Melissa is one of my favorite comediennes. The theme was binge shopping and Mike made the dangerous comment, “You’re spending all of my money!” Molly was offended, busted him, pouted, ‘I thought it was OUR money.” And proceeded to continue to buy more stuff. At one point, Mike said, “I cancelled all of your credit cards.” And Molly responded, “Even the ones I didn’t tell you about?”

And I was shocked to discover how very sad it made me. Oh, it was funny; I laughed a lot… but with an underlying fear for them both. This dynamic is not uncommon and is toxic to a relationship. I imagine there are men who shop compulsively to feel better about themselves…but I don’t know any. However, there are lots of personal choices, like overeating or drinking or gambling that men and women surely indulge…just to get that sugar high that makes a difficult life feel a little better.

Perhaps it reminded me of my own past relationship that failed. I still love her…but I didn’t fancy drowning.  It’s hard to stay afloat when one person is bailing…and the other is adding water.